On Chesil beach
The discussion on "On Chesil beach" made me think hard about my marriage of 34 years and particularly my attitudes back in 1974 and how they have changed. In those days I seem to have thought that I had to "perform" especially in bed! I learnt quickly that lovemaking was the highest expression of love - sacramental even.
It is also a very sad book and my wife felt the same about it.
Carice as always goes right to the point - why don’t we share our inner problems with each other? Are we afraid of true intimacy? Is it OK to reveal my true inner self? In this day and age when people talk glibly about their sex lives it is perhaps refreshing to think that reticence still exists but look what a disaster that can lead to! The intimate is now blazoned across the internet and the TV. Some things should have a veil drawn over them! It makes me think of the readers who ask for thrillers without sex and violence - fat chance!
I certainly do not think the novel lightweight and I put it in the tradition of Hardy and James. The placing on Chesil beach evokes echoes of other novels like those of John Fowles and Du Maurier. It is a period piece which exactly catches the times.
I have just started Alain de Botton's "States of anxiety" and I think this might throw light on British attitudes.
Like Gillian I am going to a school reunion this time after 45 years. I found on Face book the schoolmate who used to nip the back of my neck in class. He got his comeuppance when he wanted my English coursework notes from university and I refused! Strangely when I returned to the school 4 years ago my sarcastic Latin teacher was charm itself to Liz. He was clearly a ladies man and hated little boys! Similarly the class bully is now a fine upstanding pillar of the church with a daughter with cerebral palsy. So people do change their spots!
Second post to Battersea Limpets:
With all this honesty about I think I might have found the session rather daunting especially without the gravitas of Micky for moral male support! How sexist is that? Having said that, I do think our generation has been "sexualised" to such an extent and our children exposed to a constant stream of sexual images from TV and media. I think children should know about sex and AIDS and keeping safe but if it means that they grow up treating sex like a recreation I am not sure. One issue here is that of same-sex schools. Are they a good thing or not? Personally I really was not that bothered about the opposite sex until I met Liz and I knew she was the special person for me. I certainly travelled through Europe full of expectation of meeting someone special but also open to just making people's acquaintance. My diary of that period is that of an innocent abroad and that's exactly what I was! Remember South Africa was without TV and everything was heavily censored - even "Black Beauty" was banned for a time! I thought it greatly daring to go and see "Midnight cowboy" in Johannesburg! The librarians in Johannesburg used to check the rather tame Wilbur Smith knowing it would be banned usually for interracial sex. Naturally the first thing to do on leaving South Africa was to find out what all the fuss was about and some of it I found pretty dull! Has anyone ever read the whole of "Lady Chatterley" I wonder? Lawrence does go on and on so much....
I am currently absorbed in the official biography of the wonderful Desmond Tutu and that charts some of the appalling legislation under which I grew up. The church's teaching had a profound effect upon me neatly counterbalanced by my parents' eminently sensible Anglican attitudes.
If you are interested you should investigate the theology of the body expounded by Pope John Paul II which is in many ways remarkable in view of the furore over "Humanae vitae".
It is also a very sad book and my wife felt the same about it.
Carice as always goes right to the point - why don’t we share our inner problems with each other? Are we afraid of true intimacy? Is it OK to reveal my true inner self? In this day and age when people talk glibly about their sex lives it is perhaps refreshing to think that reticence still exists but look what a disaster that can lead to! The intimate is now blazoned across the internet and the TV. Some things should have a veil drawn over them! It makes me think of the readers who ask for thrillers without sex and violence - fat chance!
I certainly do not think the novel lightweight and I put it in the tradition of Hardy and James. The placing on Chesil beach evokes echoes of other novels like those of John Fowles and Du Maurier. It is a period piece which exactly catches the times.
I have just started Alain de Botton's "States of anxiety" and I think this might throw light on British attitudes.
Like Gillian I am going to a school reunion this time after 45 years. I found on Face book the schoolmate who used to nip the back of my neck in class. He got his comeuppance when he wanted my English coursework notes from university and I refused! Strangely when I returned to the school 4 years ago my sarcastic Latin teacher was charm itself to Liz. He was clearly a ladies man and hated little boys! Similarly the class bully is now a fine upstanding pillar of the church with a daughter with cerebral palsy. So people do change their spots!
Second post to Battersea Limpets:
With all this honesty about I think I might have found the session rather daunting especially without the gravitas of Micky for moral male support! How sexist is that? Having said that, I do think our generation has been "sexualised" to such an extent and our children exposed to a constant stream of sexual images from TV and media. I think children should know about sex and AIDS and keeping safe but if it means that they grow up treating sex like a recreation I am not sure. One issue here is that of same-sex schools. Are they a good thing or not? Personally I really was not that bothered about the opposite sex until I met Liz and I knew she was the special person for me. I certainly travelled through Europe full of expectation of meeting someone special but also open to just making people's acquaintance. My diary of that period is that of an innocent abroad and that's exactly what I was! Remember South Africa was without TV and everything was heavily censored - even "Black Beauty" was banned for a time! I thought it greatly daring to go and see "Midnight cowboy" in Johannesburg! The librarians in Johannesburg used to check the rather tame Wilbur Smith knowing it would be banned usually for interracial sex. Naturally the first thing to do on leaving South Africa was to find out what all the fuss was about and some of it I found pretty dull! Has anyone ever read the whole of "Lady Chatterley" I wonder? Lawrence does go on and on so much....
I am currently absorbed in the official biography of the wonderful Desmond Tutu and that charts some of the appalling legislation under which I grew up. The church's teaching had a profound effect upon me neatly counterbalanced by my parents' eminently sensible Anglican attitudes.
If you are interested you should investigate the theology of the body expounded by Pope John Paul II which is in many ways remarkable in view of the furore over "Humanae vitae".
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